Mom. Don’t look for me. I will not be returning.” Tears clouded my eyes and the words became blurry. How was he able to do this? How could my kid, who is eighteen, just up and leave?I fell onto his bed and held the note close to my heart. It had only been six months since Robert’s departure, and now Daniel was also gone. There was an overwhelming hush in the home. I kept thinking about what Dr. Chen had said at our appointment the week before. “Evelyn, the test findings are not encouraging. You’ll require continuous care, which will come at a high cost.” Since Robert’s death, I have been working two jobs in an attempt to pay off the enormous debt he left behind. Now that Daniel had left and I had my illness to take care of, I felt totally overwhelmed. My imagination replayed the funeral. Daniel stood next to me, wearing a mask of adolescent indifference while they lowered Robert’s coffin to the floor. I recalled the quiet murmurs from family members. “Poor Evelyn, left all alone with a teenager.” < “I heard Robert didn’t leave much behind.” “How will she manage?” I didn’t have answers back then, and I still don’t. But for Daniel’s sake, I felt I had to press on. I had no idea that he would leave before the week was up. The days that followed were a haze. I made calls to the local police, Daniel’s school, and his buddies. Nobody had noticed him. It appeared as though he had simply disappeared. A policeman said, “Ma’am,” very gently, “He’s eighteen.” adult in law. There’s not much we can do if he doesn’t want to be located.” I thanked him, nodded numbly, and hung up. The truth of my predicament began to set in. I was sick, alone, and in over my head in debt. I had bills out in front of me as I sat at the kitchen table that evening. The numbers flashed before my eyes: credit card statements, mortgage payments, and medical costs. How could Robert have allowed things to go so bad? “Oh, Robert,” I muttered to the vacant space. How come you didn’t tell me? We might have dealt with this jointly.”However, Daniel had also left, as had Robert. Now it was my turn. I gave Dr. Chen’s office a call in the morning. “Evelyn,” she said as soon as she answered the phone. “How are you feeling?” “I’m… managing,” was my response. “However, I must learn more about this therapy. How frequently? To what extent?” Dr. Chen sighed. Evelyn, it’s not going to be simple. For the first few months, at the very least, weekly treatments are being considered. Regarding the price…” She quoted a number that made my stomach turn. However, I braced myself. “Dr. Chen, I’ll figure it out. I’m forced to.” “Evelyn,” she said with a softer tone, “There are programs for financial aid and support groups.” Permit me to share some details with you.” I wrote down the information, gave her my thanks, and hung up. Then, back at the diner, I took up the phone and called my supervisor. “Hey, Evelyn,” Jerry said. “Everything okay?”“Jerry, I need more hours,” I responded, sounding more composed than I actually was. “As many as you can give me.”A pause occurred. You already work six days a week, Evelyn. Are you certain?” “Yes, Jerry. I require the funds.” One more pause. “All right. I’ll investigate my options.And thus my new life started. Five in the morning, at the diner by six. Work till 2:00 p.m., then go to my second job’s office where I answer phones and file paperwork until 8:00 p.m. Back home, hasty dinner, and straight to bed. Repeat. Weekends were spent receiving treatments and finishing household chores. There was no energy for hobbies, no time for friends. Just work, therapy, and rest. Weeks became months, weeks became days, and months became years. I continued to work, pay off debt, and attend therapy sessions. Daniel’s room stayed unaltered, a temple to my wish for his comeback. Dr. Chen evolved become more than just my physician. Frequently, she was the sole person with whom I discussed matters unrelated to job or bills. “Evelyn, you’re making progress, but you need to take care of yourself,” she stated to us during one of our appointments. You shouldn’t be under this much stress for your health.” I forced a flimsy smile. “I’m doing the best I can, Dr. Chen.”With her spectacles on, she gave me a look. “Have you considered contacting a support group? Speak with others going through similar experiences, if possible. I gave a headshake. “I have no time to devote to that. There are always bills to pay and shifts to pick up.”Dr. Chen did not press, only sighed and offered me a meek grin. She was aware of my stubbornness.I gradually began to dig myself out of the financial hole as the years went by. The continual anxiety of becoming bankrupt started to fade as the debts started to decrease. Still, there was emptiness. Every Christmas and every birthday, I would find myself wanting the phone to ring by staring at it. wishing for Daniel to arrive. However, that never happened. I made a couple attempts at dating, but it never felt right. How could I describe my life to a stranger? After so much disappointment, how could I let myself be vulnerable?Thirteen years went by in a fog of loneliness and tiredness. Then there came a knock on the door one evening. When I opened it, he was inside. Thirty-one-year-old Daniel standing on my porch, hesitantly grinning and carrying two suitcases. “Hello, Mom. My desire is to return home.” My thoughts raced. I wanted to yell at him for leaving me, to smash the door in his face. Rather, I noticed that I was moving aside to make room for him.aDaniel began, “I’m so sorry, Mom,” his voice breaking. He went to the living room and got down on his knees. “I experienced… issues. grave ones. I did not wish to involve you with them.” I crossed my arms and stood there. “What kind of problems?”Daniel raised his head to face me, tears welling up in his eyes. “I was involved with some nasty people. Gambling and drugs… I had overextended myself. I believed that leaving would keep you safe.” My wrath somewhat subsided. “You had the option to tell me. Together, we could have dealt with it.” He hung his head and added, “I know that now.” “I was foolish and young. Will you ever be able to pardon me?” Feeling the weight of thirteen years of hurt and loneliness, I let out a sigh. “Daniel, I need time. But for now, feel free to remain.” With the exception of the sound of forks clinking on plates, we ate dinner together in silence. It was impossible for me to ignore how much he had changed. The gaunt youth had vanished, leaving a man with wide shoulders and sunken eyes in his stead. I finally said, “So,” to end the stillness. “What have you been doing all these years?” Daniel moved the food on his plate around. Mom, it’s a long story. I’ve traveled far and wide. Attempting to organize myself.” “And have you?” With a stronger tone than I meant to, I asked. “Sorted yourself out?”He gave a nod. “I believe that. I’ve cleaned up now. had been for some time. I have an appointment at a city employment. All I needed to do was see you first. To express regret.” I was tempted to trust him. How I desired, God would have it. But I’d learned to be wary after thirteen years of disappointment and loneliness. Daniel, that’s excellent to hear. I’m happy that you’re improving. Daniel said in a murmur, “I missed you every day, Mom,” as I led him to his former room. I nodded, not believing I could talk. There was a flicker of hope when I shut the door to my bedroom. We may try to mend our relationship again. I woke up around two in the morning to weird noises, shattering that hope. With my bare feet soundless on the chilly floor, I tiptoed down the corridor. Daniel was there, looking through the closet where I stored my savings, lit up by the moonlight. The money I’d worked through illness and fatigue for years, pinching and saving. “What are you doing?” Even though my voice was hardly audible, Daniel jumped as if he had been shot. With a wad of cash in his hand, he spun around. “Mum! I… I’m able to clarify.” “Get out.” The words lacked warmth. “Get out now, or I’m calling the police.”Daniel’s expression twisted. I caught a glimpse of the little boy he used to be. Then his face became stern. He didn’t say anything, but picked up his luggage that were still at the front door, and headed out. I hit the floor as the door slammed behind him. Even though I was crying nonstop, I had an odd sense of calm. It had been thirteen years since I’d lost him. I’d made it through a chronic sickness, terrible debt, and Robert’s death.I could also make it through this. I had to make a choice as daylight broke. It was time to put myself first and surround myself with genuine caring people. Daniel was done making decisions. It was time for me to make my. Reaching for the phone, I contacted Dr. Chen. I left a message when her answering service picked up.It’s Evelyn, Dr. Chen. I believe I’m prepared to join the support group you indicated. And… I believe I should speak with someone. Perhaps a therapist. When you can, give me a call back.”How would you have responded in that situation?
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